How To Get Her Back... The Starting Points Of Any Relationship Repair Strategy
by George Karanastasis, M.D.

If you’re currently going through a breakup and don’t know how to get her back then let me help you get started on the right foot. Before you can even think of planning a relationship repair strategy you must take into account the following four factors:

  1. The length of the relationship
  2. The exact time since the breakup occurred
  3. The reason for the breakup
  4. The sequence of events that occurred since the breakup (e.g. mistakes you’ve made and her reactions to them)

Now why is it so important to take the above into consideration first before attempting to get her back? It’s quite simple actually:  these are the exact 4 factors that will determine your unique strategy for getting your girl back from this moment forward.

Because no matter what anyone tells you… every relationship is different. What worked for someone else won’t necessarily work for you. So while you can’t take a “canned approach” with your particular case… what you can (and should) do is take your current circumstances and use them to formulate a strategy that maximizes your chances of success.

For example, the length of the relationship… why is this so important? Because this defines how fast you must act to win her back and how much leeway you have with making mistakes. As a general rule of thumb, the longer the relationship was the more you can afford to step back and let time take its healing role without fear of losing her altogether. In contrast, if you’ve only been dating for a couple of weeks then giving her 3 months of space will not help your situation much.

Next, why is the time since the breakup so important? Because time works directly against you when you’re trying to get her back. So the shorter relationship was the faster you must put your strategy in place.

Next, the reason for the breakup… did she break up with you because you were too needy or because you didn’t pay her enough attention? Why is this important? Because it determines how aggressively you should pursue her.

For example, if your breakup resulted from not giving her enough attention and you haven’t made the classic mistake of begging her back, then you need to actively attempt to solve your differences. However, if neediness on your part was the culprit in ending your relationship then backing off is the approach of choice.

And finally, the events that occurred since the breakup… these are everything from errors made on your part (begging, pleading, etc.) to steps she’s taken towards getting back together; in general they’re the circumstances that take your relationship and make it completely different from everybody else’s.

And while attempting to cover these events is beyond the scope of this article keep one thing in mind: never try to “reinvent the wheel”. If something is working for you or has worked in the past then use it as part of your strategy. If not, then dump it and take the opposite approach.

So in conclusion, no matter how unique your particular breakup scenario is, it’s more than possible to come up with an effective strategy on how to get her back by taking the 4 starting points and putting them together to maximize your chances of success.


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